The Journey

2011-09-14T10:05:00.000-07:00

(Judg. 4:4-9)
4 Now Deborah, a prophetess, wife of Lappidoth, was leading Israel at that time. 5 She would sit under the Date Palm Tree of Deborah between Ramah and Bethel in the Ephraimite hill country. The Israelites would come up to her to have their disputes settled. 6 She summoned Barak son of Abinoam from Kedesh in Naphtali. She said to him, “Is it not true that the LORD God of Israel is commanding you? Go, march to Mount Tabor! Take with you 10,000 men from Naphtali and Zebulun! 7 I will bring Sisera, the general of Jabin’s army, to you at the Kishon River, along with his chariots and huge army. I will hand him over to you.” 8 Barak said to her, “If you go with me, I will go. But if you do not go with me, I will not go.” 9 She said, “I will indeed go with you. But you will not gain fame on the expedition you are taking, for the LORD will turn Sisera over to a woman.” Deborah got up and went with Barak to Kedesh

A few months ago, I heard another sermon about the spirit of Jezebel and Ahab. I watched as men teasingly poked their wives and in return ,the women doing the same as the characteristics of each ‘spirit’ were revealed.

I sighed alot during that dialogue. Not because the spirit of Jezebel and Ahab are not present in our society and churches, but because the message was not balanced or tempered.

A wife who truly loves God and but feels a lack of spiritual growth in her family, may move in a Jezebel spirit…but I doubt it. She may lead because of the spiritual demise of her family and the lack of spiritual leadership but she is not a Jezebel because she leads the family.

The Jezebel spirit abuses the weakness of the man she is with and uses it to keep power and glorify her role; the mantle of Deborah is God issued and leads temporarily . This wife would rather her husband be the lead of the family. She prays for it, yearns for it and dreams of it.

I feel these women who walk in Deborahs role can take a soft or hard position in their families lives. They can be soft spoken or forthright. Deborah was both in her nurturing and her rebukes. Deborah was plainspoken and did not mince her words. She spoke as she saw it and knew it to be.

Deborah also was not at home with her husband. She was sitting under a tree, judging and serving outside her family to take over as a prophetess where a prophet should have sat.

Jael, the woman who drove the spike through Sisera’s head wasn’t a Jezebel either. She was praised for her role for not sympathizing with her husbands covenant with Canaanites. She rebelled and was not rebuked.

Though a woman’s spiritual uprising may be necessary, it’s not Plan A. It’s God way of giving a sign to the home and church that we are not where we are supposed to be in bringing in God’s Kingdom and taking dominion of this earth in all aspects.

All I want is balance..God's way. As I believe most women and men do.

Peace

2011-04-29T22:21:00.000-07:00

Lamentations 3: The Remix ( The Cry of Humanity)

1-3: The Lord is punishing me. He doesn’t accept me. He won’t talk to me. He is ignoring me. He doesn’t care about me.

4: I grow older every day. My body is wearing out. I am losing my youth and I have lost my strength.

5-6: I am unhappy. I have worked so hard in life and for what? I might as well be dead.

7:I am prisoner of my life or my circumstances. I can’t get out of this rut. It’s all just hopeless

8: I have tried God, and he has never answered my prayers. If there was a God, why would he do this to me or let this happen?

9-11: I think people are out to get me ,everyone including God is against me. Nothing I do comes out right. Everything I do comes out wrong. I can’t do anything right. Why even try anymore?

12: I’m just a joke. No one takes me seriously. At school, or work or home. I’m disrespected and regarded as nothing.

13: I hate my life, I hate my family, I hate my work, I hate me…

14: I am physically beaten by my spouse, or my parents or bullied at school…I am emotionally beaten up by my circumstances, I can’t cope, I’m lower that dirt and I’m treated that way.

15-17:I am in debt, I have lost my job, I can’t pay my mortgage, I might lose my house..I have lost sleep over this…

18-20: Does God see me? Can I still Trust Him? Does He exist? Will I ever get out of here? Is there any hope?

Jesus has felt every pain, every physical, spiritual and emotional ache that we have thought or said out loud. He heard these cries and he bore our sins as well as our grievances, disappointments, bitterness’s, failures and our hopelessness’s on His road to Calvary.

In the Cross and by His blood, we have been given the free gift to renew our lives in this world and to begin living as the head and not the tail.

Through His Resurrection, we have been given the power to move beyond our circumstances and to reject the predictions and economics of this world. To fulfill our destinies, and to exchange the devil’s kingdom of facts for God’s Kingdom of Truths.

Romans 12:2 tells us to renew our minds. We do this by capturing every thought (2 Cor. 10:5) and putting it under Christ’s authority. When we do this we are bringing power back into our lives by rejecting the devil and making him flee. (James 4-7)

Our outlook will begin to change, as our minds begin filling with God’s Truths. Our eyes will begin to see what God sees and solutions will replace our hopelessness bringing the Joy and Peace that He promises us. His ways are above our ways (Isaiah 55:8-9)…but they are not unattainable, we only have to decide to seek it…and we will find it.(Matthew 7:7)

2011-02-28T06:21:00.000-08:00

I count all as lost so that I may gain Christ..

..and at the same time believe for all things.

Nothing is impossible with God...

2009-09-30T12:46:00.000-07:00

John 16.33 I have told you these things so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart, I have overcome the world.

Amen

2009-09-26T19:20:00.000-07:00

2 Cor 4:8-9
we are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed;

My husband and I have felt pressed from all sides as we follow His will. That pressing has pushed us into God's arms. Empty of ourselves, we stand before Him; waiting. And for the first time in a long time, I have found myself asking "why?" as though I just met God yesterday.

I lay no claim to faith that moves mountains or soars me above the storm. I claim only that I see no other choice but to move forward in the faith that I have been given ; to pray when I feel led to pray; to standstill or move in battle against the enemy when I am urged to do so from deep within me; to speak or be silent; or to be still in all my mind, heart and self strength and know that He is God.

I know from past experiences that in the end of this sojourn , God will be waiting for us and He will hold us as we rest our weary heads on His shoulders and our tears will flow freely in relief.

God will loosen the chains of our heavy hearts, and we in turn, will loosen those in bondage around us who were our tormentors, defeating the devil in his own game.

But the greatest reward will be the ability to believe in God for more.

So I guess, I already know my answer to "why is this happening?" . I am my own witness...

2009-09-10T21:07:00.000-07:00

One day, God came to me and asked, what is it you seek?
I said with a humble attitude: I seek to be a good Christian.
God said: then lay down your life.

On another such day, God came to me again and asked , what is it you seek?
I said in my most holy voice: I seek to administer your gifts to the church.
God said: then lay down your life.

God sought me out again and asked me, what is it you seek?
I said with conviction: I seek to save souls and build your kingdom.
God said: then lay down your life.

Then one day it came to me to ask God , "what is it I should I be seeking?" He answered : "You found Him"

2009-09-10T04:37:00.001-07:00

2009-08-20T12:14:00.000-07:00

Hello my dearest and as for me… I’m from a pretty flower, the opium poppy. My real name is heroin, I won’t let you down… But because of the stigma, just call me brown. My sister lives in China, she’s out-of-site… She’s stronger than I, her name is white. Now that you know me, let’s have our first date… Once you inhale me, it’ll be too late. It won’t be long and we will be courting… At this point my love, you’ll be tired of snorting. Starting to smoke, we’re now engaged… Chasing the dragon, He’s now enraged. When we are married, on our honeymoon… I’ll introduce you to the needle and spoon. I’ll then take your will, since you’ll be my wife… Stay with me long, I’ll even take your life. I’m your master now, do what I say… Lie, cheat, and steal for me everyday. When I’m not around, I’ll share you with friends… Misery and suicide, it never ends. You’d better be careful, if you love too much of me... Because I’m a widower, from all the O’dees. If you try to divorce me, I’ll even the score… Plan on being sick, like never before. Even if you kick me through physical signs… I’ll still be there to play with your mind. I’ll haunt you with craving the rest of your life… So what ever you do, stay away from Christ. Through Jesus’ shed blood, I’ll be undone… And then we won’t have all of our fun. His deliverance is sure, there is no mistake… But to save you the pain, don’t start to date. Stay a chaste virgin from me and my friends… Because I’m a lie from beginning to end. I promised you marriage, a beautiful high… But all before you are in prison or die!

Written by Lawrence DuBois In what inmates call the “God Pod” Yakima Department of Corrections Yakima Washington USA copyright ©2000 All Rights Reserved in Heaven

2009-07-01T12:43:00.000-07:00

Born to be Wild...the Segway VersionGet your segway runnin
Get out on the bike path
Puttin on my helmet
Get ready for my wrath

Yeah Darlin gonna make it happen
Takin the world in a princess wave
Fire all your guns at once
It’s a super segway race

I like noise and pollution
Takin in the exhaust
Passin all the bikers
Feelin lIke I’m boss

Like a true Segway child
We were born , born to be wild
We can glide so fast
Even with my leg cast

Born to be wild
Born to be wild

2009-06-10T12:56:00.000-07:00

Elisha on his death bed speaking with the King of Israel. (Joash)

And he said, Take the arrows. And he took [them]. And he said unto the King of Israel, Smite upon the ground. And he smote thrice, and stayed.

And the man of God was wroth with him, and said, Thou shouldest have smitten five or six times; then hadst thou smitten Syria till thou hadst consumed [it]: whereas now thou shalt smite Syria [but] thrice.

What is Faith? Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. Hebrews 11:1.

Today on my way to work, I was thinking about a huge HOPE that I believed God had given me for a couple of family members who didn't know Jesus and who's walk was headed straight into lifetime hurts and sorrows. For me, my prayers seemed a gigantic ticket for God to fulfill and as I prayed, I asked God, "Am I doing this right? Am I hoping out of my own desires? Am I hoping for too much? ... and this is what I heard " Your hope for them is much smaller than the outcome I have prepared for them. " And I started to cry. Of course! God is SO much bigger and His Kingdom so much more vast than I can EVEN imagine.

I understood that I am the planting ground for God's faith, and in me He holds the Evidence of things not yet seen to be revealed at a later date when the time is ripe. Faith is not a crutch or blind...it is very real. Faith tangible, accessible. living, breathing,wanting to become REAL...

I also understood that we can't out-Hope God. We can't have more Faith than what is already bursting at the seems of His overabundant Kingdom...waiting for us to ask ...and receive.

With Love

Donna

2009-04-01T16:15:00.000-07:00

Gen 2:17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die."

Proverbs 14-10:There is a path before each person that seems right, but it ends in death.

We must stop the spiritual cannibalism on each other and face the one who is the author of all our religious blindness. We have to stop eating from the tree that brings death and start gorging on the Tree of Life with wanton fervor.

God will not allow His Church be placed in bondage forever. She will wake up and she will break free because she was meant to be alive...

I'm not the first person to ring this bell or sound the alarm and I know I will not be the last.

Rev 19:7
Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready.

2009-04-01T13:05:00.000-07:00

I am sick in my spirit.

My heart filled with sorrow.

Father, slay me before letting me hang a child of Yours from a tree.

Bring me low if I take one of Your little ones, and beat them with words of condemnation.

Make me to walk in chains if I lock up a loved one in a dungeon of remorse that does not come from Heaven.

If I lean on my own understanding and pride pours saltwater from my lips, then dry up my bones so I can flow no more.

If my words, whether written or spoken, are not of Heavenly origin,
keep me silent before You.

In this way, I will Live ... and death will not consume the innocent.

Amen

Pro 13:3
He that keepeth his mouth keepeth his life:

he that openeth wide his lips shall have destruction

2009-03-28T07:54:00.000-07:00

I know thy works,

that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot.

So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot,

I will spue thee out of my mouth.

Revelation 3:15-16

It's interesting how a person can be get indoctrinated and not even know it. For years, I believed that being cold was a bad thing ( a sign of lack of love for God and a good sign that I was going to hell) and that God preferred us hot (a sign of passion for Him and opposite of cold) but I want to share with you (for those who were taught as I) a new look at a very fire and brimstone verse.

I believe that God was not speaking about the temperature of a soul and it's dedication to God. I believe that God was speaking about how we are supposed to minister to those He brings into our path and how we are to approach preaching the Gospel of the Good News.

I find myself hurt by Christians that believe that if someone's eye lusts, that they are the tool to poke out the eye of their neighbor. God was speaking about our own eyes...not the eyes of our neighbors. But this is what comes from the teaching of religion that says we must be hot for God without teaching the balance of the cool liquid .

Instead of the Word becoming an instrument of healing, it becomes a drink of condemnation. God drank both the hot and the cold..he only spit out the tepid water/liquid because the properties to cool or warm up the body had been lost. Similar to eating salt that has lost it's saltiness.

To the soul that has been chilled by the coldness of this world...a hot liquid that burns and warms his throat will drive the numbeness out of his body. To the soul who has lost his way in the desert...his bones turning to dust...the gentleness of a cold liquid brings cooling to his burning insides and brings the temperature down to where he can think again.

There must always be a balance in whatever we do in the Name of God and a true Love for more than just "saving the soul" of the person God has put in our path. Our goal is to drive out Satan and his kindgom and cause him pain...not the person we are bringing out of bondage.

2009-03-27T21:28:00.000-07:00

What is man that You take thought of him,

And the son of man that You care for him?

Psalm 8:4

Today I drove home with the question to God as to my importance or rather my insignificance in the grand scheme of things. Where do I fit into the picture? I am only one grain of sand amongst thousands, billions....

The hugeness of His answer could not be contained in my minute and finite mind. Only in Spirit could I understand His Love...but even then...I do not really understand.

I have so much still to learn. So much to experience...and with each experience...comes revelation. I should not reject what comes my way because in it...could be the answers I seek.

Psalms 139: 17-18 How precious are your thoughts about me,* O God! They are innumerable! I can't even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up in the morning, You are still with me!

This world will someday come to an end and the way we go about our daily lives...will also come to an end. The change is inevitable. And the hugeness of that Truth...brings my own thoughts to a screeching halt. Am I prepared, and how many have I helped prepare for that time? Am I doing enough? Or have I squandered away my inheritance ?

I could begin to feel very small....in His plan for the entire world, the universe and all His creations. But in His mercy He opened my ears to hear His voice and to teach me to believe in what I don't see in myself but what He sees clearly. I lean us His complete knowing of what He has created me for and not my inability to feel or understand what that may be. The enemy cannot touch me when I am standing on God's view of me.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11 (yes one of my favorites filled with fruits of Truth...eat and prosper)

Be still and know that I am God. Psalms 46:10

2008-12-21T12:27:00.000-08:00

Sometimes the simplest confession from a hurting soul, still clinging to God with hope is the purest form of worship....

"Beauty From Pain"

Superchick

The lights go out all around me
One last candle to keep out the night
And then the darkness surrounds me
I know i'm alive but i feel like i've died
And all that's left is to accept that it's over
My dreams ran like sand through the fists that i made
I try to keep warm but i just grow colder
I feel like i'm slipping away

Chorus:
After all this has passed, i still will remain
After i've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today,
Someday i'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

My whole world is the pain inside me
The best i can do is just get through the day
When life before is only a memory
I'll wonder why God lets me walk through this place
And though i can't understand why this happened
I know that i will when i look back someday
And see how you've brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames

Chorus

Here i am, at the end of me
Tryin to hold to what i can't see
I forgot how to hope
This night's been so long
I cling to Your promise
There will be a dawn

After all this has passed, i still will remain
After i've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today,
Someday i'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

'For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11

2008-12-15T18:37:00.000-08:00

The weather has been so cold this week. I remember really hating the cold because I could never get warm.

Somehow in the wisdom of old age, I learned that if I dressed weather-appropriately , that the winter was actually a beautiful season.

Today was one of those days. As I walked to my car from work, the sun shone brilliantly through the trees as it descended into the evening sky. The ice on the snow below me glistened like little stars beneath my feet. The wind whipped wildly around me, bringing flurries of snow down from trees in a white wall of winter. The ice-cycles , hung tenaciously from the edges of my car, making me laugh as I kicked them off childishly.

It was beautiful, and I could enjoy it because I was dressed warmly. I didn't have to rush to my car to get away from the cold and the wind didn't bother me at all.

Later in the evening however, when stopping by the grocery store, I decided that I didn't need to put on my gloves or hat since it was such a short jaunt from my car to the market. Boy, was I wrong. Even when I had my boots, scarf, coat and other layered clothing on, the cold took it's bite into my flesh and I walked quickly, head down , counting the steps until I could get into that warm store.

So what's my point?

A day ago, I asked a friend for prayer because of a very difficult time I am having right now standing up underneath a trial I am going through. Her simple reply to me was Eph. 6:10-18. This has always been one of my staple verses. I repeat it to everyone I know when fighting the enemy. I guess I was missing the mark and God needed me to receive a fresh understanding.

Here's a small part I would like to emphasize

Eph. 6:10-12

NLT A final word: Be strong with the Lord's mighty power. Put on ALL of God's armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies and tricks of the Devil. For we are not fighting against people made of flesh and blood, but against the evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against those mighty powers of darkness who rule this world, and against wicked spirits in the heavenly realm.

Somewhere, I have taken a piece or a few pieces of the armor off and because of that, I am feeling the sting of the enemies arrows as they hit my vulnerable areas. I cannot see the beauty or the promises of God through this time, because I am too busy feeling the pain and keeping my head down to keep the chill from entering my soul.

If I were dressed correctly, my eyes would be open, head up, chin forward, hands ready to battle, not stuck in my coat pockets.

I feel better now that I understand what I have allowed to happen and now can follow up with prayer.

Here's to Good Friends and God's Living and Breathing Word and to Every Season that our life experiences because each one we pass through, brings us closer to Him.

2008-12-03T12:53:00.000-08:00

This funny picture was sent to me by a friend and I could feel the frustration of the home owner when opening that box of lights, working on untangling the mess and then just giving up and shoving the whole wreck on a hook as a message to the world. Who couldn't sympathize?

But then my mind wandered a different way. Which am I? A ball of light with no meaning. Or a string of lights, with rhyme and reason? But that would take stretching me wouldn't it?

It isn't enough that I bring light to the world or even how brightly I glow. As illustrated, this ball of mess will glow brightly and then most likely overheat and burn out quickly. That is me.

Not that God still won't use me in this position. He just has to keep replacing the burned out bulbs in His ultimate mercy. I guess it's time to let Him untangle this mess and stretch me so He can use me the way I was meant to be used. LOL

2008-11-22T08:01:00.000-08:00

Jesus answered , "I am the Way and the Truth, and the Life and no one comes to the Father, except through me. "(John 14:6)

Is it possible to idolize truth? To seek truth as though it were the door to vast empires of hidden treasures and then lose your soul?

I believe that most of us who seek "truth" are only actually seeking FACTS.

What we see and hear and speak, may have transpired or will transpire but is not necessarily the TRUTH.

So then what is Truth? Truth is not a time or a place or an action. Truth is a Person.

Our reaction to Facts do not necessarily agree with the actions to Truth.

When we react to Facts, we work on our own power. We bring guilt, shame, worry, anxiety, fear etc into our lives and into the lives of those we love.

When we react to the Truth...we bring freedom and set captives free. Including ourselves. (John 8:32)

2008-11-22T04:25:00.000-08:00

To Anonymous,

What we don't have in common is less important than WHO we have in common.

I do not believe in chance meetings.

I will pray for you not because I feel I am better than you, but because when we break down the walls of our flesh, we are the same. Both saved and living by His Grace.

2008-11-20T12:51:00.001-08:00

The Open Road

Wind in My Face

Freedom to Think

The Thrill of Being Alive

No Destination

2008-11-20T10:03:00.000-08:00

Sat in a great church last Sunday. People were awesome, music was annointed. Sermon...ugh. The good intentions of some pastors to lead their people out of their self-centered posture by using a hammer ,chisel and a little condemnation.

I just need to say this:

We do not do all the sacrificing and receive nothing in return. There is nothing wrong with being the center of God's attention and the apple of His eye. Everything He has done, has been done for us. We love Him, because He first loved us. We call on His Name, because He calls us first. We sacrifice ourselves , because He first sacrificed His Life for us. Please do not preach self-sacrifice without the rewards of doing so. God does not ask us to empty our hands only to have them returned empty. He empties ours hands so He can fill it with Himself and the wonderous Glory of His Kingdom. Tangible riches of unexplainable beauty. If we preach self-sacrifice for God's Kingdom without the reciprocation of God, then it comes out to be works, which breeds bondage. Bondage is like yeast, a little goes a long way.

2008-09-08T16:46:00.000-07:00

Take care of my precious son My Lord. Guide him from the snares of the enemy, whether in the form of flesh or spirit . Let defeat never escape his lips even in the face of it, and let hopelessness never enter his heart . Let him experience Your Peace even when he is surrounded by death, hate and unrest. I pray that the Angels that sang on the day of his birth, follow him into battle to fight along side of him in the world unseen. Bring him home to me Lord with a Banner of Victory flying over his head held high and proud. Let your praises spring from his lips for all You have done for him and all that You will do.

Lastly , I bow my head to You Lord; You who gave His one and only Son to die for our freedoms. In that knowledge I give you my son with all my heart. And my trust is in the fact that You love him more than even this mother's love can fulfill. He always belonged to You even when I called him mine.

2007-12-13T11:27:00.000-08:00

"..but He never intended his laws to be a snare to us, or to entrap us with consequences and dark interpretation".. excerpt from a friends' blog quoting Jeremy Taylor.

It seems most would rather hold onto their religious floatation devices than walk on the water. Is God my friend? or my Master? Am I His servant, or His friend? Do I treat Him as a father who loves with me with all that He is or as my maker and with fear of retribution? Am I spreading the Good News by speaking of Freedom in Christ, or am I bringing bondage?

Coming from a background of rules and religious measurements, I am so new to this new world that God has opened up to me. The freedom to breath and to move and to live. I try in the most simplest forms to share what I've learned so far with those around me...little baby bites, testing the water to see if what I've been given to eat will be excepted by those around me....and it surprises me that's it's not. I say "taste this, it has flavor and it's much better than the bland, colorless paste that you are eating" But they keep their eyes downward , afraid to believe other than what has been taught to them from generation to generation.

I sit in their religious meetings to hear them taught that "God has a heart but it only beats for those who fear Him. To fear Him is to love Him. He rejoices when we feel low and downtrodden. He wants us to feel burdened by our sins and to make sure that everyone around us also feels the same. So make sure that our fingers are excercised daily by pointing out our neighbors sins because this will diminish our own sins."

Or better yet, we sin all the time to the point that we sin and do not even know that we are sinning. Therefore we are sinners. No matter that we have been reborn, it means nothing. We were born into sin, therefore we were reborn as sinners. Jesus died so that we could become reborn sinners. Why even repent then, if when I repent, nothing changes. I am still a sinner and sinners go to hell.

But wait...listen... If I have been reborn, and reborn into Christ, then I am no longer a sinner. I am now a saint. And as a saint, I will sit with Christ and my Father. As a saint, my head is not bowed, but looking up to see what Jesus is looking at. My head is no longer buried in the sand nor my feet burdened down by my sins. I am free to walk, and run and to fight in God's battle. Now I am living the life of rebirth. My focus is not on who I am, but on who HE is and who I am in Him. My life is not my own. I now belong fully to Him in my rebirth, I am not a sinner tripping in my sins, I am a saint and an ambassador for God. I know now that it has not been suggested to me but commanded to me by God to walk on water, fly with the eagles and to tell the mountains and Satan to get out of my way because I don't have time to dawdle with the abstract. I must walk in the reality that God has placed before me. His Kingdom come, His will be done on earth as it is in Heaven....

2007-11-10T02:33:00.000-08:00

Rubik's Cube Solved Blindfolded

2007-08-17T12:16:00.000-07:00

This is just a great picture.

2007-08-17T11:33:00.000-07:00

We have no problem believing that Jesus died for us but we do have a hard time believing He also lives for us and in that Life, He gives us a better one to hold on to; His own.

Scripture states that there is no condemnation in Him, only acceptance. Then why do we find it hard to accept the Grace that Christ offers us unconditionally?

I say look deep inside ourselves and we will find our own spirit of discrimination, judgement of others and impossible 'Christian' standards that we have set up for those around us , and also judge ourselves by.

What if our children hesitated to be with us, hug us or play with us because they weren't the most perfect child? A ridiculous thought. But yet, we do this to God. If He died for us while we were still sinners, then won't He now accept those He redeemed with open arms? Yet we still hesitate to be with Him or speak with Him or to ask anything of Him.

It's time to stop being a child and start becoming an adult with the understanding of an adult. It's time to stop pouting and feeling sorry for ourselves and to grasp the meaning of God's ultimate sacrifice.

Everytime we allow the enemy or our own shallowness to keep us from God, we diminish what He did for us and it loses it's meaning as well as it's power in our lives.

2007-08-03T17:41:00.000-07:00

IF.............

So here is an ‘if’"question for you. Say that I am a sojourner looking for a god, a force, or a being that supposedly is in control of this world. I end up in a Mormon church because they have those great Jesus commercials or I finally say yes to the nice Jehovah's Witness who didn't give up and faithfully came to my doorstep every Saturday.

I become a faithful participant of whatever denomination I have chosen. However, I wasn't given the fundamentals of the necessity of asking Jesus into my heart, and no one ever put their hands on my head and spoke the PRAYER of SALVATION, that if I repeated verbatim, would put me onto heavens doorstep . Jesus and I never really get 'personal'. And it's obvious to the 'true' followers of Christ, that I'm still in the "searching, trying to "get some religion" stage.

Now say, that I’m sitting kneeling, standing, singing, arms up or down at church and the rapture occurs? What's my outcome?

Mat 7:7
Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:

Does it count that I was LOOKING or KNOCKING?

2007-07-26T16:16:00.000-07:00

Of all the gifts that God asks us to seek the most...it was Love. Not the anointing, or tongues, or miracles or preaching or teaching etc ...but Love.

I believe that everything that has to do with His Kingdom is wrapped up in that ambiguous word.

I have been taught, pushed, encouraged to walk in Love, speak in Love, give in Love...but do I understand the 'magic' hidden inside?

I've touched the tips of it, seen remnants of it as miracles occur or lives touched...but I believe there is so much more. Like water behind a dam waiting to overflow it's boundaries ; Love is like a torrent river cutting through jagged rock, swallowing everything and everyone in it's path. Inside me , turbulent waves of Love push against my walls of indifference.

Am I ready for that?

Job 9:4 His wisdom is profound, his power is vast. Who has resisted him and come out unscathed

Job 38:8-11 “Who shut up the sea behind doors when it burst forth from the womb, when I made the clouds its garment and wrapped it in thick darkness, when I fixed limits for it and set its doors and bars in place,when I said, ‘This far you may come and no farther; here is where your proud waves halt’?

2007-02-03T17:47:00.000-08:00

I found an interesting site. www.xxxchurch.com. Sounds scary. I know. But it directs people searching for porn to it on purpose. It's a group of people who are attempting to bring Jesus into the porn world. Not an easy job. They have recieved good and bad reviews from the porn industries and the Christian world. I can't help feeling afraid for them....but at the same time roaring them on "GO!". They have very unconventional messages and distributions....but I have no judgement. I want to brave like them..I drive past the Mr Peeps down the road and verbally throw a Godly 'stone' it...(feels more like a pebble really). I don't feel like I'm doing any real spiritual damage. The devil probably laughs at my attempts. But these people at xxxchurch. Wow.

By the way, NO, I didn't find this site by searching for porn...minds out of the gutters please. I actually saw them on the news. :)

D

Are you ready?

2006-11-20T20:52:00.001-08:00

2006-11-20T14:43:00.000-08:00

Stillborn-Again

Given a second-chance to live again..

Before your rebirth you did not judge,
now you have become the jury…

You shine your light before all men…
you blind them with your holy sh*t

Your heart stopped beating a long time ago…
and your mother weeps for the life that

could have been….

You were better off when you were born the first time. …
blind to religion…
but now you think you see..

No eyes, no ears, no heart….

Stillborn-Again….

2006-11-17T13:59:00.000-08:00

Okay this one was funny.

2006-11-17T13:47:00.000-08:00

I love my SUV.....

2006-11-01T17:57:00.000-08:00

I was reading a friends blog, and he brought up a thought that triggered a sad memory in my journey.

After 14 years of marriage, my husband and I divorced about 7 years ago. At that time my children were 11 and 6. I knew it would be hard on them, but children are resilient aren't they?

After about 1 1/2 years went by and I was beginning to heal and thought that most of the pain was behind me....I was wrong. My youngest cried himself to sleep for almost 2 years.

As my eldest came towards his 13th birthday, he surprised me with this song that I have shared below. That day, I cried afresh with this knowledge that it would never really be over. All his future experiences in life would be measured by this one tramatic experience. To him, we had betrayed his trust. And we had.

Though my soul burns with hurt, whenever I hear this song, I'm glad that he shared this with me. I deserve to be burdened with his pain and I will carry it forever.

Everclear "Wonderful"

I close my eyes when I get too sad

I think thoughts that I know are bad

Close my eyes and I count to ten

Hope its over when I open them

I want the things that I had before

Like a star wars poster on my bedroom door

I wish I could count to ten

Make everything be wonderful again

Hope my mom and I hope my dad

Will figure out why they get so mad

Hear them scream, I hear them fight

They say bad words that make me wanna cry

Close my eyes when I go to bed

And I dream of angels who make me smile

I feel better when I hear them say

Everything will be wonderful someday

Promises mean everything when youre little

And the worlds so big

I just dont understand how

You can smile with all those tears in your eyes

Tell me everything is wonderful now

Please dont tell me everything is wonderful now

I go to school and I run and play

I tell the kids that its all okay

I laugh aloud so my friends wont know

When the bell rings I just dont wanna go home

Go to my room and I close my eyes

I make believe that I have a new life

I dont believe you when you say

Everything will be wonderful someday

No I dont wanna hear you tell me everything is wonderful now

I dont wanna hear you say

That I will understand someday

No, dont wanna hear you say

You both have grown in a different way

No, dont wanna meet your friends

And I dont wanna start over again

I just want my life to be the same

Just like it used to be

Some days I hate everything

I hate everything

Everyone and everything

Please dont tell me everything is wonderful now...

I dont wanna hear you tell me everything is wonderful now

2006-10-06T13:10:00.000-07:00

God’s Shalom

On September 29th, I turned 41. I decided to throw myself a big fat party for getting over the 40 hump and officially being 40 something.

Through the years, life has definitely thrown me a few curve balls and at times I was thrown off balance from trying to dodge them.

If my life were a tapestry, then I would say that it started out with the colors of pale pinks and blues. Not because I had it easy, but because I lived in a dream world to escape the realities of a hard childhood. And then again in my adulthood, I ventured into my fantasy world to soften the blows of a bad marriage. During those times, my tapestry, though torn and battered, was still pastel colors of the lightest shades. A victim of my circumstances and choices, I believed that these were the colors of peace and serenity.

But true Peace, God’s Shalom, sometimes has to rip apart the works of our hands and tear the seams to make way for His Kingdom. With the ripping, many tears are shed and the fantasy world exposed for what it is. Fruitless. The works of my hands, the fruits of my field, the wasted years of my life exposed to the light of God’s scrutiny.

Now At 41 , I am no longer the young girl that hid in a world of unrealities, but instead, I face towards the challenges. Head towards the wind. Eyes forward. My tapestry has changed too. Long gone are the colors of a child, now replaced by colors of Crimson Velvet. The colors of a grown woman who relies in the boldness and strength of her creator and the beauty of Jesus and the Blood He shed for her.

At my party, I invited old and new friends together along with my beautiful family. And though not everyone from my past or the present was represented, a fair number came to celebrate the day of my birth into this world. I watched as they interacted with one another. They were all parts of me, melding into one fellowship. As I looked on, I saw the living tapestry of my life and I became saturated in the richness of it all. My life was celebrated that day with love, laughter and revelry and that night I went to bed satisfied.

I no longer dodge those curves balls, instead I catch them and throw them back. Life can only get better from here. No matter what the circumstances.

It doesn’t mean I won’t feel defeated, victimized or a failure at times as a woman, a mother or a wife. What I mean is, that life has a way of coming around full circle. Past meets present and melds. Jesus doesn’t throw out our experiences , but brings it all together and sews His life in with ours. He uses bold, beautiful colors with rich fabrics and strong threads. He creates new from old and wraps us in it.

This is reality. This is God’s Shalom

2006-08-23T08:00:00.000-07:00

Who am I? By Casting Crowns

Who am I?

That the Lord of all the earth,

Would care to know my name,

Would care to feel my hurt.

Who am I?

That the bright and morning star,

Would choose to light the way,

For my ever wandering heart.

Not because of who I am,

But because of what you've done.

Not because of what I've done,

But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,

Here today and gone tomorrow,

A wave tossed in the ocean,

A vapor in the wind.

Still you hear me when I'm calling,

Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,

And you've told me who I am.I am yours.

Who am I?

That the eyes that see my sin,

Would look on me with love

And watch me rise again.

Who am I?

That the voice that calmed the sea,

Would call out through the rain,

And calm the storm in me.

I am yours.Whom shall I fear?

2006-08-22T17:19:00.000-07:00

Fly with me....

I wanted to add a comment to my last post:

I understand that we live in a fallen world. And in it is pain, and sorrow and anger and hate to name a few. I am not overlooking these facts. But for those of us who do have jobs, and don't live in Burma without homes, have children without handicaps, who have all of our limbs and can buy a new bike for our children, why are we so down spirited? Why are we so depressed? In the ‘natural’ we have so much to be thankful for and yet, we let the littlest things pull us out of the "Christ" mode. For those who are in a bad place right now, my desire is to learn how to fly so that I can pick you up and teach you to fly with me. Or maybe, if you learn before I do, you will do me a favor and teach me. I do know this: Flight in the supernatural is not dependant on our circumstances or if there is no wind, because His Spirit will be the wind underneath our wings!

Peace/Shalom

2006-08-22T12:24:00.000-07:00

Natural vs Supernatural

Day in and day out, we wake out of our slumber , get ready for work, drive our cars, punch in 9-5 and go home to start it over again. This is the natural existence for some of us. On Sundays or on an other designated day of worship, or during focused times with God, we ‘escape’ our normal existence for the hope of a higher one. For a moment, we are flying in a different dimension, time, existence…..and then too soon, time is up, and the ‘real’ world is calling again.

Definition of NATURAL: occurring in conformity with the ordinary course of nature : not marvelous or supernatural b : formulated by human reason alone rather than revelation c : having a normal or usual character

Here's a thought: If we and everything around us were created by a Supernatural God, doesn't that make us and everything around us Supernatural?

There is nothing NATURAL about our human existence or the existence of all that surrounds us. So doesn’t that mean that in essence we as believers or unbelievers walk in His Supernatural world everyday, in Supernatural bodies?

All around us, surrounding us, we inhabit and take into our bodies the Creations of God. We have taken dominion and created a mundane sense of natural upon a supernatural existence.

The fact is that in life we can still experience pleasant and rewarding surprises when we come out of the ‘natural’ and begin to exist in His Supernatural. Any walls or cages that have been built into our lives, were built by human hands and minds, not by God. I truly believe this and am striving for it.

2006-08-13T23:37:00.000-07:00

The 'Good' News....

To all the BIBLE THUMPERS out there…

THUMP on this.

I am here to preach the Good News that Christ died for our sins to appease the old law, that He has risen from the dead to create the new law. That by doing so He has given us abundant life on this earth and beyond this earth. He has done away with the old wine skin and poured a new Spirit within us. He has redeemed us so now we can have fellowship with our Father here on earth and live with Him eternally after this life ends.

Now that you know who you are in Christ, go preach this to all Nations: Preach to them that they are not worthy of this gift. Make them repent but never let them forget how bad they are. Always remind them of their lowliness so that they can never reach the high places. Let them know that they can never be really good, or truly do good things. Preach with conviction, that what Jesus did for us on the Cross is not truly a gift, but a ‘thought’ of what it would be like to be righteous. Tell them that even as repugnant a person as they are, God has found mercy upon their pitiful, dirty soul. He has even decided to actually love them. Rejoice in it therefore and spread the Good News.

Rom 8:5
For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit.
Rom 12:2
And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what [is] that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
Isa 65:17

For, behold, I create new heavens and a new earth: and the former shall not be remembered, nor come into mind

2006-08-07T13:22:00.000-07:00

Our Burdens VS God’s Burdens

A few days ago, one of my beautiful friends in Jesus and I spent time away with God. On our agenda was the need to have answers to the wreckage in our lives. We intended to not leave without an answer and would suffer our bodies until we did.

Though God shared with us many valuable lessons, this was the most significant to me. Today I share it with you.

Scripture states that we should rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep. Do you feel that burden? Burdens bring us to a place of prayer and supplication. To a place of weeping and wailing. To be burdened by the world's sorrows is to follow in Christ's walk. Right?

Mathew 11:28-30 Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke fits perfectly, and the burden I give you is light."

I believe we struggle not with God’s yoke, but with our own. We fret, worry and fear. How then do we break chains for the souls around us or our own? We can’t do this if we are carrying the burdens, sorrows or horrors of this world that Christ died for on our fragile human shoulders.

God has asked us to have His compassion on the world, to extend His love, and to spread the good news of His salvation. If we attempt to touch the ones we are trying to rescue from bondage with our own hearts, our own hands and even our own experiences , we will trap ourselves and the ones we are attempting to rescue under a yoke that is too heavy for us to bear. We are not the world’s salvation.

Listen to Christ’s words on the cross. “IT IS FINISHED”. It is finished. Hear this. Let this pour into your soul. Let is wash the burdens that you carry away with His blood. It is finished. Christ has completed it all. He has not died to burden you but to lift the burden for you. He tasted death so that you would not have to. Hear this and begin to breath again.

Our faith, our hope, our joy is centered on this fact. We cannot go out into the world , without first knowing Who carries us. We cannot teach the ways of Christ, without understanding the basics of what He has done for us in love.

We are excited to share the gospel, to bring the message of Christ to a dying world. All around us we hear their cries, we see the filth, the lust, the death…must I say more?

So how do we live in the world without being part of the world? This seems like a contradiction to God’s love. But I will tell you how. We share the Truth about what Christ has done, we serve, we give, we can even weep, but we mustn’t become burdened down by it's sufferings. We need to be able to keep moving in order to be a vessel of rescue. We can’t afford to get stuck on a sandbar because we are carrying too much weight.

Now how to do this in a practical manner? By Faith. Faith is Fact:

Faith is the fact that God love us and His face is towards us. Faith is the fact that God listens when we speak to Him. Faith is the fact that He does care about us and those we are helping. Faith is the fact that when we pray, God goes into action, immediately. Faith is the fact that even though we do not see the answer, the answer has been answered in the invisible and is as real as we are. And the most important is: Faith is the fact that God heard you the FIRST time you asked. If you believe this, then your burden will already feel lighter.

We have been taught by religion that we should keep knocking , that we should seek and keep seeking, that we should keep asking. But what was Jesus really teaching?

Mathew 6:6-8 But when you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father secretly. Then your Father, who knows all secrets, will reward you.
"When you pray, don't babble on and on as people of other religions do. They think their prayers are answered only by repeating their words again and again. Don't be like them, because your Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask him!

The Father wants your heart to be still when you pray. Read Mathew 6:6 again. To pray in secret can mean inwardly or silently. (No stressing or straining to grab God's attention with loud noises or wailing.) Then Mathew states that God will reward us openly. Openly means just that. He will give it to you in plain view

Now to the verses that ‘teaches’ us to beg; Mathew 7:7-8

Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.

Because of one translation of “ASK” which could mean beg but also means crave, desire, call for, and require, most of us have been taught this: Keep asking, keep seeking, keep knocking , until you get your results. In other words, beg the Father for your needs. Cry harder and repent of every sin you have ever committed because your Father may refuse you! Sit in ashes and sackcloth, mourn and maybe He will answer you. Keep repeating the same prayer over and over and maybe He will just get tired of you asking and give you what you want.

These are not the days of the Old Testament when, to be heard, a lamb had to be slain each time. Where layers and layers of spiritual battles were battled in the heavenlies to make an opening so God could hear the cry of His children. Jesus died so that God hears you right away. Today, now and even before you speak it.

Today be still and know that He is God. Be at rest and at peace. Quietly with knowing reassurance believe that He has your best interest at heart and for the ones you are praying for. Do not be burdened down by this world; do not let Jesus have died in vain and without purpose. Give Him all your burdens and leave them with Him. BELIEVE that He Loved you so much He died for you so that you could have a life beyond the broken and joyless exhistence that Satan has to offer you.

Trust His Word for you and Rejoice. He will surely accomplish what He has started. But wait…Oh that’s right…He said He has already FINISHED it.

2006-08-02T08:08:00.000-07:00

Women with power....

What's that song I hear in the background? Is that Helen Reddy? What is this about "roaring women''? And what is that other noise in the background?..oh, it's the moan of a thousand men.

Coming from a woman-lead corporate background, I can tell you that women in power can be both a good thing and a bad thing. It all depends on the woman.

A woman who attempts to become a "man" in what she believes is a man's world is a woman that doesn't understand her true 'power'. (I hear the moans of a thousand men again.) By power I do not mean manipulative influences. If you know a manipulative woman, you will find beside her either a controlling man (husband ) or mother or maybe both.

For seven long years, I worked alongside women in 'power'. They attempted to dress like men, walk and talk like men. I hated working for women with this attitude toward their own feminity. (By the way, if there are any men out their missing their testicles, please email me, I might know where you can find them. )

I think women need to drop the ball (literally). Doesn't that wheelbarrow get heavy after a while?

Okay, who threw the tomato? Let me now get to the point of this blog before the entire vegetable garden is tossed at me.

My sisters, settle down. Open your ears to what I'm about to say. We were created women with wonderful powers of influence, intuition,and insight. Our feminity is not a weakness. The saying I've hated the most : Men are visual and Women are EMOTIONAL. Emotional, hmmm, an 8 letter cuss word if you ask me. I think a man started this quote. If a woman started that quote, then find her and toss your tomatoes at her instead. I'll help.

What I have seen, and why I believe women have began adorning themselves with the appendages of men (I speak figuratively, I know that surgery now make this a possibility, but I'm not going there right now) Where was I? Oh yes, women have been adorning themselves with men's appendages because of men's attitudes towards the 'weaker sex' and our need to prove them wrong.

Men have allowed themselves all sort of debauchery because they are VISUAL. Porn magazines, stripper bars, fantasies..to name a few. Most of the women I have 'interviewed' have stated that they don't really like men's extra curricular activities, but were made to feel as though they were imposing on the 'good ol' boys' . There is nothing wrong with male bonding. It's important for guys to get out too. But don't be swayed into believing that any real male bonding goes on at a strip joint.

We teach our sons that it is 'natural' for them to be VISUALLY stimulated. That doesn't necessarily have to mean sexually. There are many beautiful things in this world that create visual stimulation and are meant to be objectified. Women's nude bodies succumbing to men's morbid fantasies of submission is not one of them.

For every woman out there, who has ever felt that she was less than, I am here to say you are more, much more. Don't back down from an argument or a fight because you have been told that you are being emotional. Instead tell whomever that you won't allow them to turn the discussion into an illogical arguement and stay on subject. Don't be distracted by this tactic to 'put you in your place'. Just keep in mind that your desire to have respect, is not an emotional woman's issue but a humanitarian one.

I feel sorry for men who teach their sons the term 'mama's boy'. How devastating to the son who loves his mom, but afraid to love her completely because of the 'disease' she brings with her and how she will make him weak. It breaks my heart.

I'm here to tell you to celebrate your feminity. Celebrate your womanhood. Your emotions are not weak but needed in this world. Your emotions are a gift of God. Emotions are everywhere, our art, our music, our history, our victories and our defeats. Without the color of emotions, we would be living in a black and white world.

My whole point is this. We have unique strengths that can only come from being a woman. It's time we celebrated them. Look inside yourselves and find your gifts. The more feminine the better! Hold them close and dear. Don't let them be stolen or taken from you.

Well wishes my sister. God be with you.
Donna

2006-08-01T22:15:00.000-07:00

Rekindled Friendships

Today I had the opportunity to speak with an old friend from my past. As I spoke with him, so many memories come flooding back of the "simple" days. I had enjoyed afternoons after church at his and his wife's home and a few very close friends. The fellowship was so deep that I could drink from it and not be thirsty for days. I couldn't get enough from the conversations thrown so carelessly in the air. There was never a moment of awkward silence and the time would fly by too quickly for me. I could have stayed for hours if not days.

Today as in the past, so many wonderful topics were discussed that it made my head spin. It is always wonderful to meet up with friends no matter if they are old or new. I have a deep appreciation for everyone that has touched my life. I believe that every individual that I have been able to call friend has left their fingerprint on my heart in someway.

The last few months have been like this for me. Renewed friendships have burst into my life like spring foliage after a long hard winter. I revel in these moments.

My heart feels raw with emotion for every new/old friendship that is rekindled. The past flooding the present is monumental for me and I feel God's hand directing it all. He is up to something. I know it.

But my reason for this post? To say that I love each an every one of you that have come back into my life. I don't believe that our 'chance' meetings are coincidental.

If I had a champaign glass I would give a toast . " To all my old friends and new ones, here' s to old memories merging with new ones. Thank you for being my friend"

2006-07-30T16:03:00.000-07:00

A Cry from the World........

Tourniquet (Evenescence)

I tried to kill the pain but only brought more
I lay dying and I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal
I"m dying praying bleeding and screaming, am I too lost to be saved am I too lost?
My God my tourniquet return to me salvation
Do you remember me? Lost for so long will you be on the other side or will you forget me ?
I'm dying praying bleeding and screaming am I too lost to be saved am I too lost?
My God my tourniquet return to me salvation
My God my tourniquet return to me salvation
My wounds cry for the grave , my soul cries for deliverance
Will I be denied Christ's tourniquet ,my suicide

Read The Suffocation of the Sanctuary by Eric Blauer:http://www.fcb4.blogspot.com/

In his Blog, Eric exposes the truth about our unwillingness to reach out to the harsh souls of this world who could care less about what is right and what is wrong. Those that make up their own rules and obey no one elses but their own.

We separate ourselves from them because they are too tough to deal with and handle. They are rough around the edges straight into the core of their being . If we flinch at their coarse language or refuse to sit and drink with them, or spend time in their world, then we have lost them to the world.

I agree with Eric. We have to be willing to toss aside our 'clean' robes and strip down to our naked flesh. Expose our scars, our wounds our humanity and not be afraid of our barbarian side. Always anchoring ourselves to the cross as we slip into the pit. We will have to throw away our idea that we are their to 'save' them. They will see right through that. Instead we are asked by Christ to extend a hand in friendship and to see them as righteous and without reproach.

2006-07-30T13:25:00.000-07:00

Open Arms of Love (Sierra)

When the worries and cares of life
They weigh me down
When every dream comes crashing to the ground
When the tears have all run dry
And there's nothing left to cry
In the quietness I hear You calling me
I feel You drawing me
And I run into the open arms of love

I long to dwell In the presence of my God

My soul finds rest In the shelter of Your wings
And I run, I run, I run
Into the open arms of love
So, never let me go From Your embrace
Clothe me in a garment of Your amazing grace

In the shadow of Your wings I find the peace
Your presence brings
And Your Spirit's softly calling me
It's gently drawing me

Psalm 91: He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will Rest in the shadow of the Almighty

2006-07-19T17:46:00.000-07:00

Where is the sacrifice?

I just watched a really interesting video. http://bligbi.com/2006/07/25/wheres-the-sacrifice/

A young man not aruing the exhistence of Christ, His sacrifice or even the fact the Christ rose miraculously from the grave, but that Christ's sacrifice was not a sacrifice at all.

I should have cried but I found myself laughing instead. I felt as though I was listening to child who hadn't listened to the whole story even though he claims to have read the Bible from back to front.

It sounds ridiculous to those of us who know without any doubt what Christ has done for us. But for the wanderers, the doubters, the lost, and the God-haters...they find 'truth' in this foolishness.

2006-07-13T21:44:00.000-07:00

Today my son left for military school. Though my heart broke to see him go, I am hoping that it will leap with joy when he comes home.

....."But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. Luke 15:20

2006-07-08T12:29:00.000-07:00

Dedicated to my son.

My hopes for you.....

I hope that....

You find what you've been searching for in life,
You are able to gain old wisdom in your youth,

Any tears you have to shed are tears of joy and not sorrow,
You can spend time cherishing life, and those around you,
If one of your dreams dies, another bigger and better one comes to take its place ,
You'll learn to forgive the ones who hurt you and always hold close the ones that love you,
You will live life like you are running in a race to the finish line even

if you know you won't be first,
When you are alone, you will call on the One who can touch you no matter where you are,
When you grow old and time slows down, you can look back and be

happy with where you've come from and who you've become.

Love Mom

2006-07-06T13:42:00.000-07:00

THE TRIAL

Before me stood the person who had caused me pain beyond what I felt I could bear. I stood next to the Judge and gave witness to my bruised heart and open wounds that would bring tears to any jury. I spoke with earnest when I said, "he is guilty, Your Honor, he deserves to be punished"

I knew without a doubt that the Judge was on my side.

I looked down at the guilty one with righteous indignation and knew that I was better than him and therefore innocent of any wrong. I stood tall with the truth I had spoken.

Then a form of darkness walked into the courtroom. His name was the Accuser. He did not speak on his own. Instead, he had with him a puppet that spoke his words for him. I looked closer at its face and recognized the features as familiar. Then, I heard the puppet speak and the words were my own; and the face... to my horror, was mine also. My heart stopped as I listened to it speak, "he is guilty, Your Honor, he deserves to be punished"

The truth dawned on me then that I was not the handmaiden of the Father as I had thought, but the puppet of the one I hated more than the person I was charging of a crime.

Unforgiveness had blinded me. I was in bondage and I realized that my hatred had chained me to living inside that "courtroom" forever. If I wanted to be free, then I needed to let go. I looked at my Father/Judge, who had been quiet the entire time, finally nodding His head at my understanding. I set my burden of "evidence" down, and I walked away without looking back.

Luke 6:37 Be not judges of others, and you will not be judged; do not give punishement to others, and you will not get punished yourselves, make others free, and you will be made free.

2006-07-05T16:49:00.000-07:00

The stage is set: the drama unfolds......Like a moth to a flame, I am drawn to and engulfed by events in the lives of those around me. The melodrama, chaos and exposed emotions bubble to the surface like lava from a dormant volcano.

Should my life be more at peace and rest? If I had more faith would the stormy waves stop before they reach my front door? I don't believe so.

Looking at Jesus, His life here on earth could have been considered the ultimate soap opera. Though He walked in the supernatural, He was surrounded with melodrama. Adultery, accusations, betrayal and family strife to mention a few...were part of His everyday existence as God on earth. Why? Because He was involved and in the center of all those around Him. He didn't skirt the issue, walk away until the dust settled, or compromise ..... and where there was 'peace'...He stirred the dust and created the drama so that complacent or captive hearts would be forced to feel again.

As much as He inspired love and forgiveness, He inspired division and controversy.

2006-06-29T09:38:00.000-07:00

I wrote this a while ago. I really didn't have a lot of direction at the time and I had felt so alone. I'd walked away from the only Person who really cared for me and I was trying to find my way back.

So many worries pass me through me each day.
Like unfriendly neighbors, they knock at my door or call me on the phone.
They have no decency, no manners and no caring.
They interrupt my pleasant thoughts.
I try to change my mind, but they are loud and obnoxious.
I can't even cover my ears to drown them out because they have found a way to speak directly to my heart.
My Heart, why are you listening? There are so many other good things to think about and to listen to.
Even now, they whisper in the back of my mind and conspire against me to steal my peace and make me anxious.
Hold steady Heart, be strong of mind....someone is calling, someone is knocking...I won't answer unless it is Him.

2006-06-28T08:45:00.000-07:00

Wow, my first post
I hesitated at first to do this. Why would I want to post my private thoughts, opinions or feelings with the world? Maybe I feel that I have something to offer or that it has therapeutic properties. Whatever the reasons, You, the reader, will be privy to my views on life and offered a forum to reply with your own ideas if desired.

I do not have a goal at this time or an agenda. I assume that my writings will evolve into something substantial as time goes on. Thus, the title "The Journey".